SECRETS TO PEACEIssue 322-09November 18, 2009
Dear welcome,
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* Opportunities
* Where and Why
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Where and Why
Reading from The Wisdom of the Lotus
Sutra, I recently encountered these
words from Daisaku Ikeda: "All human
endeavor is inspired by the effort to answer
the questions: Where do we come from? Where
are we going? Why are we here?"
Examining any one of these questions I could
fill volumes just in the searching I have
performed over the last fifty five years.
Look around today and it is easy to find
groups dedicated to examining or offering
answers to one or all of these questions. I
have met some people who absolutely knew the
answers to all these questions; satisfied
that their truth was the Truth.
I feel happy for them. They are no longer
tortured like those who seem incapable of
reaching any conclusions (yet still feel
driven to ask the questions.) The mind likes
conclusions. It detests dangling
uncertainties. The human mind would rather be
certain, at the risk of being proven wrong
later, than uncertain, in an open-questioning
mode. There is comfort in certainty,
regardless of the factual basis for the
assuredness.
Personally, I do not believe most of my life
was spent pondering any of Ikeda's questions.
For the first twenty one years of my life I
just wanted to know how to "be small;" how to
do what I was supposed to without getting
into trouble. The more invisible, I proved to
be, the less stress I felt. I do not recall
having any questions which were more profound
than "what is the safest for me in this
situation?"
Then I discovered drugs and alcohol. I still
did not have any questions, which I recall,
similar to Ikeda's, but now I had found a way
out of the chains that my previous questions
caused. Of course, being afraid of breaking
the rules, I now had new questions, such as:
"How can I do this party thing and not get
caught?"
My life at this point did not consist of any
profound search for the meaning of my
existence, only logistical questions like how
I could score and how I could avoid
detection, needed my examination.
I never really asked myself, or another, an
honest question concerning the nature of my
existence, until I met a man in Korea who
introduced me, to some Eastern teachings. The
thoughts I encountered changed my questions,
although not right away.
It was just over four years later when I had
a look in a mirror, following a particularly
hard-partying weekend, and asked myself, "Is
this what I am here for? Is this all there is?"
At age thirty, I began to question why I was
here and where I was going. I still did not
wonder much about Who I was or Where I came
from. I had pretty well accepted that I was
the physical offspring of my biological
parents, end of story.
For the next twenty-plus years, I studied
everything that was placed in front of me on
the nature of my being and how one finds
their calling in life. A few close calls with
death and I began thinking I had been spared
to do something, or at least that my work
(whatever that was) was not complete here on
Earth.
With my recent heart challenge I once again
have been asking "Where am I going from
here?" So, while my life did not start out
with Ikeda's questions foremost in my
awareness, they have certainly motivated my
quest for meaning for the last twenty five years.
Today I do not really have any answers. I
often share what I think and I expect that
to continue, if I
keep writing this blog.
Today I simply love the mystery.
I love the fact that I will leave the house
in a few minutes and I have no clue who I
will meet and how we will change each others
lives.
I love the fact that I am embarking on a new
endeavor but history has shown me that the
direction I think I am heading may create a
journey I can not foresee.
Do I have a reason for being here?
I do not know, but I promise myself to live
this day like my soul's mission is to be an
Emissary for Love to all I encounter. Life
has taught me that this "high" is better than
any escape vehicle I ever experimented with.
Do I know where I am going?
Beyond my next, immediate, move I do not have
a clue. This voluntary uncertainty adds a
great excitement to my life. It keeps me open
to a meandering and explorative curiosity
which makes every day a treasure, waiting to
be ravished.
Do I know where I came from?
I believe I always have been and always will be.
I believe that I Am.
For me, that is enough.
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Opportunities
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